Drawing The Line At Abusive Customer Behaviour

Customer service professionals have to deal with angry or frustrated customers at one time or the other throughout their careers. It is expected that the service rep (or employee) is able to manage the customer’s emotions and also resolve the issue causing the frustration or anger while enduring any inappropriate behavior such customers may exhibit towards them.

Most of the time, the emotional integrity of the service rep, who has to absorb the harsh words and unpleasantness of these angry customers is not taken into account. Where do organizations draw the line and say – ‘You might be a customer, but we can’t allow you treat our employees this way’

When organizations don’t put checks in place to protect their employees from abusive customers, they become  –

Passive Aggressive – Yes, the employee is not supposed to take any of it personally, but the truth is when employees are left at the mercy of customers who demean them, are rude or downright abusive, and are still expected to be warm and friendly – they learn passive aggressive ways to let off those negative vibes (Read: Passive aggressive behavior in customer service).

Disengaged – When your employees are not engaged they cannot be passionate, and will only show up to work because they have to earn a living. With that sort of employee attitude, you can forget about excellent customer service or high customer satisfaction indices.

Human beings have emotions (unless your employees are powered by IBM’s Watson) it is important that you lay down rational boundaries that protect your employees from the ire of abusive customers, and safeguard their emotional integrity.

Where to Draw the Line


1. Customer is using racial or obscene words

No one deserves to be ridiculed because they are from a particular racial group. Empower employees to be able to firmly tell such customers, that they will not get any help unless they behave appropriately. A sentence like:

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“Mr. Smith, i understand you are upset, i am trying to help you, but I will be unable to help you effectively if you continue to use words like that on me” 

Will send a polite but firm signal, that such behavior will not yield progress.

Never allow the customer continue if they’re using inappropriate language on you or your staff. Besides those obscene words will make other customers in the vicinity uncomfortable, and in the end, nothing reasonable will be achieved. If the customer cannot be calm enough for a reasonable conversation, remind them that you are always there to help and willing to sort the issue out in a mature and reasonable manner.

If the customer cannot be calm enough for a reasonable conversation, remind them that you are always there to help and willing to sort the issue out in a mature and reasonable manner.

2. Customer is threatening physical harm or injury

Although every customer has the right to voice their concerns, no customer has the right to threaten the life of staff or to damage company property. If you feel the situation is getting out of control; tell such customers that you will ask them to leave if they cannot get a hold of themselves, this must be done as firmly and politely as possible.
Use sentences like: “I understand that you are upset Mr. John, but your anger is making our other customers rather uncomfortable, we both need to be calm to find a good solution to this issue”

3. Customer becomes physically aggressive

If the customer despite all these rational steps to calm him/her down becomes physically threatening, then it’s time for them to go.

Explain to the customer, that their behavior is threatening and making your other customers’ experience unpleasant. Make the customer realize that every other customer witnessing their tantrum has the right to a positive and safe experience whenever they visit your business. Use a sentence like:

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“While it is my duty to see to it that you are satisfied, it is also my responsibility to protect the lives of my employees and customers, so I have to ask you to leave the premises”

“I will be forced to call security to protect my staff and customers, if you do not leave voluntarily”

It is important that you sound firm and polite, avoid getting into a shouting match with the customer, most times it only worsens the situation. Also remember, that other employees and customers are watching, it’s as a good a time to show your professionalism in such situations.
You might have to usher the customer out, by walking towards an exit or have the security personnel handle it themselves.

If they customer becomes physical, you have to defend yourself, and call in security.

It is no longer enough to train them to ‘be calm’ and ‘not to take it personally’ when customers are mean and abusive. Realize that employees equally have emotions, and it has to be put into consideration. 

Have you had an encounter with an abusive customer? I would love to read about it, click here to share your story 🙂 

Kelechi Okeke
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